LovePrints- A thank you to heroes

Love in action. Action in love. Love out loud.

The idea of LovePrints is simply covering the world in love. Covering those in your path in so much love that nothing else can stick. Covering others in so much love that they have to take their love and your love, and cover others in it. One act at a time. Repeated.

A perfect example of this is todays heroes. The Woodlands Central Firemen. Chief Alan Benson, Lt. Jason Hansberger, Firefighters and Paramedics Adrian Dinges, Tyler Knutson, and Richard Reeg, Pat Bradley, and their team of partners in service are shining examples of heroes. They rally for the local residents in need, and in my case, saved my life.

A year ago, I had spinal fusion surgery. The day after I was released from the hospital, I was using my walker to move around as instructed by the doctors when I realized that something was wrong. I sat on the edge of my bed, and while I put on a sleeping mask, my wife called 911.

They arrived at our new neighborhood in minutes, calming me, my wife, and quickly got me together and on the way to the hospital. Quickly. Calmly. Together. They talked me through it, assuring me, and putting me at complete ease. Before I knew it, that had me on the wagon and in the doctors and nurses hands for help and diagnosis.

A few months later, I made a point to track them down. I was told that due to privacy rules, they are often in the dark about how the people they rescue turn out. Having blood clots and a saddle embolism put me on the extreme end of probable outcomes. Because they did everything they could, I am still here. I made a point to track them down. I showed up at the firehouse after trying three other firehouses, and I had found the right place. The right heroes. I took them some treats wrapped in hugs. I promised to return.

Today, I returned. I brought them enough food for three days. Steak, chicken, burgers, potatoes, corn, and fruits. I even had some brownies thrown in just in case. If I gave them more, it would not be enough. They gathered around and let me talk. I thanked them. If I thanked them a thousand times, it would not be enough. I tried.

I gave each of them a LovePrints bracelet for themselves. I gave each of them a second one for anyone that they cared about, or someone they crossed paths with who was having a tougher day than they were. Pictures, handshakes, and hugs later, I left them. I took a moment to gather myself as tears rolled down my cheek. I looked back, and then up, and said several more thanks.

The next time you get a moment, say thank you to those people who give of themselves for us all. Those first responders, live savers, caretakers, rescuers, and heroes. Those who make tough situations better. Those who answer when you call to do just what you need for things to be better.

Do not wait. You know what to do. They deserve it. You deserve it. You both will feel better once you do.

Go

Love.

Charlottesville is love. And, loved.

Great people make great towns. Great towns make great people. Love in action. Action in love.

Love. Out. Loud.

Charlottesville, Virginia. Have you been there? It is quite beautiful. Elegant. Epic. It is home to some amazing people. It is home to some amazing scholars. It is home to some amazing athletes. It is an amazing town.

Charlottesville is now a hashtag. Not for the million reasons the people of Charlottesville would choose. Or even have nightmares about. It is home to the University of Virginia. Picturesque, a home to scholars and thinkers, writers and readers, creators and innovators, entrepreneurs and corporate leaders, Presidents and Generals. It is awe inspiring from inside and out.

Charlottesville is now a hashtag. For reasons hard to fathom, almost as hard to accept, and unbelievably painful. It is now the talking point for extremes, the pathway for horrible decisions, and a reminder of what was, what is, and what simply can not be.

Charlottesville is lovely. It is loving. It is powerful. It is brilliant. It is all of ours.

Charlottesville is bruised. It is in pain. It is standing in the mirror evaluating its good. And bad.

Charlottesville will now take that look and make a decision. Who is it?

Is it this? Or that? Is it going to reclaim its own name? Is it going to say who it is loudly? Will it go silent?

My thought is that Charlottesville will stand, straighten its back, stick its chest out, and hold its head high.

My thought is that Charlottesville will proudly proclaim that it is what we who know Charlottesville already know.

Charlottesville is love. And, loved.

Charlottesville is be love in action. Charlottesville will action in love.

Charlottesville will love out loud.

That is who Charlottesville is.

Love, and loved.

We are Charlottesville.

A players trust. Be what you ask them to be. Be what you want them to be.

Great coaches make great people. Great people make great coaches. Coaches are tasked with leading young people. Please be sure to lead them somewhere wonderful.

Love in Action. Action in love.
There is simplicity in moving young people together, in a singular direction with a singular purpose. They must trust you. They must believe what you say. They must believe that what you say is good for them. They also must believe that you know from personal experience that what you say is good for them because it was good for you.
A very wise coach told me that he had made a lifetime of mistakes so that I did not have to. He was there to share his mistakes, wisdom, and direction. He knew that path that I was walking on, and was there to tell me where the nasty holes in the road were. He was there to help me avoid them. If he could only get me to listen.
The young person is open. They want to believe you when you give them advice, direction, and orders. They want to be able to move quickly and purposefully on your words. To do so, they have to believe that you have been there before. Seen that thing before. Succeeded in that situation before.
The question is this and will always be this:
Have you?
As a coach, I constantly speak on having been through whatever my players are going through. I remind them of moments that were similar, moments that were identical, and how they played out. It helps if I had seen it before and it ended in some successful way. Or, it ended in a lesson that I would never repeat. A lesson that I would never let my players repeat.
A great coach shares himself. His successes, failures, wins, and lessons. One of my favorite coach phrases is Win or learn. Never lose. Losing requires a disconnect. It requires an indifference. It requires a refusal of ownership. A lack of accountability. And players do not lose. They learn. A coach has to be willing to accept ownership of lessons, and pass them along in a constant effort to go towards the common goal. Forward and Up.
A great coach shares his wins. Openly, and out loud. He celebrates the collective progress towards whatever it is that the team is striving towards. A great coach must also be the common goal. They must be the exact image of what they young people should be pursuing. They must be the living example of what the road forward and up will take them to. Remember, the young people need to believe that the coach knows what is good for them, and can get them there. The coach needs to be exactly what the young people aspire to. If they do not admire the coaches path and journey, they will not aspire to it. They simply will ignore it and go on their own path and journey, disconnected and on their own.
A great indicator of trust is watching young people follow a coach. If they trust the coach, listen to the coach, and admire the coach, they will follow. They will do so willingly, freely, and completely. If a team is not following a coach, they do not trust the coach. Its up to the coach to be worth admiring. Worth following. A coach simply has to look at themselves to know if it is so.

Parents. One word. Two letters. No.

 

Great people make great parents. Great parents make great people.
Love in Action. Action in love.
No. N. O. Two letters. One word. Powerful. The answer to several questions, and maybe the greatest thing a parent can say to their young athlete.

There are tremendous advantages in the freedom provided in the word no. No can be the most wonderful of standard setters. No, you may not do less than your best. No, you may not settle for less than your dreams. No, you may not be lazy. No, you may not take the easy route. No, you may accept less than your worth.
No, I will not go talk to your coach. No, I will not let you switch teams. No, this time you could have done more. No, I still love you. No, I still want what is best for you. No, I can not do this for you. No, your teacher isn’t wrong. No, I will not allow you to do that.
I make daily efforts to be the king of YES. Yes, you can. Yes, you will. Yes, you are. Yes, you should. Yes, you could. A pat on the back, a look in the eye, a smile in chaos, or a hand on the shoulder. Yes,  in the grand enabler for those in need. No serves a great purpose. It is a pause. It is a needed change of thinking. It is a suggestion of another way. It is the pointing in a different direction. When used properly, it is a needed re-route to YES. It is the new way. It is the better way.
No can be an acknowledgment that your young person is growing. It can be a flashing light that their bright eyes are searching for more, or looking for better. It is the whistle that calls for attention, it indicates a need for another voice. Another thought. No can be the simplest statement. It can also be the loudest.
No can remove doubt, elevate goals, and increase desire. No can move a young person off an idle position, and into a decisive one. It can take indifference and cause a change of energy and reason. No can be the reason why, the reason how, and the answer to whatever the other questions are. No can cause more questions, lead to more answers, and indicate a void of a valid and absolute either.
No can be a babysitter, a mentor, a teacher, or a muse. It can be the engine of inspiration, ambition, and success. It can be the key to understanding, appreciation, and motivation. It can be the stop sign, the caution sign, or the detour. It has strength. It has reason. It has a way.
Do not be afraid of your no. If used properly, and lovingly, it leads to YES.
Have it at. Just say no.

Multi sport athlete. Single sport coach.

Great people make great coaches. Great coaches make great people.  

It is a constant. The two are connected, and rely on one another. Thankfully so.

My question for today is:

 

What happens when a two or three sport athlete meets a single sport coach?

That happens more than is discussed, and often leads to some conflicts of interest, conflicts of purpose, and conflicts in the direction of the most important person in the equation. The multiple sport student athlete.

I feel like I need to repeat this. The most important person in the coach-athlete equation is the athlete. The student-athlete. The multiple sport student-athlete. As unpopular as this may sound, this little fact is far too often forgotten. Ready for this? The coaches are there for the student athletes interests. Not the parents. Not the administration. Not the fans. Not the coach himself. The coach is there for the student athlete.

It is far too common to hear stories of coaches coaxing, nudging, encouraging, and down right demanding that the student athlete not participate in another sport. Studies have shown that participating in multiple sports gives these student athletes advantages over their single sport counterparts. From developing a diverse set of skills, to better conditioning and the using of different muscle groups, there are many advantages.

Why would a coach push for single sport participation?

Selfishness. That is the answer that comes to mind immediately. Pure selfishness. Thinking solely about their team, their sport, and how the student athlete benefits THEM. I know that some coaches will say that its so that the player can pay more attention to the sport that they are best at, or more attention and time to develop the skills needed for them to play that single sport at the next level. Or maybe, they will say that the student athlete is not good enough, and needs to work harder. Or even that they are doing the student athlete a favor. They are helping them.

No. They aren’t.

Most high level, top of the standard college coaches will tell you that they prefer student athletes who have learned to use their skills in different situations. Each sport requires a different skill set, and different problem solving ability. A different conditioning program. Use of different muscle groups. Different abilities to adjust to what the sports puts in front of them.

I am not sure why this is still an issue. Coaches should be thrilled that the student athlete is learning to work in small spaces, getting longer in strides or shorter in strides, to be more explosive in traffic, and to be explosive in space. Most coaches would appreciate the assistance in getting an athlete better during his improvement season, rather than using the same muscles and skills that he or she already has. You would think that getting more comfortable with their bodies in different situations would be a benefit, and not a problem.

What I would hope is that the great coaches will remember why they are there, and for whom they are there. What I would hope is that the parents remind both the coaches and the student athletes of what their constant top focus and priorities are. The student athlete. And that the parents will remember that as well. They should be the light and not the corner. They should be the yes instead of the caution. They should be the parent, loving, directing, and celebrating the student athlete.

As for the student athlete, please remember why you are there. Why we are all there.

For you.

As a coach, parent, or other, please remember who you are there for.

Next question?

 

Why?